My last 30 years

Yesterday I turned 31!!! WOW where did the years go? Obviously I can't remember all of the great things (or even the bad things) that have happened in the last 30 but I can remember a few things and realize my blessings far more this year than I ever have in years passed.

In the last 5 years, I've lost friends, lost love, lost family, gained love, gained family...I guess really I'm no different than anyone else in the world.

I lost my Dad after a battle with Cancer, I'm still thankful how quickly he passed. I know it sounds weird but he was always the big tough man, and I'm glad for the mercy of a quick battle with Cancer for him. For me, I'd still be taking care of him just to have one more hug or one more talk. I wish still with a deep heart that he could meet my husband and know that I will be taken care of b/c of him For him to see his namesake Aubrey, and see the light in his eyes when she laughed at him.

I met my husband and joined the Air Force where our love bloomed. He wrote me letters literally everyday and without that intimate communication and being forced to communicate to keep our relationship alive I'm not sure we would be as close as we are. Since, I hurt my knee, got honorably discharged from the military and came home and got engaged. Now we've been married almost 2 1/2 years and have a baby!! WOW! For those of you that have known me for more than 5 years probably still are in shock that I'm married with a family. As my cousin, Jenny Stout said "I'll believe you are getting married when I see it happen". Well its happened and I get be more thankful....most days!! HAHAH (love you Honey!)

This last year has been the most rewarding, most trying time I've ever experienced. My 30th year brought me motherhood and showed me just a little glimpse of the love that God has for me by me feeling the love for Aubrey. We've experienced circumstances in our family in the last year or so that ripped at our livelihood and at our hearts and at our relationships. But looking back....we've made it through yet another year intact and still extremely happy and blessed. Our children (all 3) are healthy, loved and very much well rounded. Our marriage is full of love and even though just like other marriages we experience challenges its still completely fulfilling and I can't be more thankful that I get to share my life with Patrick. I can't imagine raising our children without him or doing it alone. You're still my best friend honey, thank you for being the one that I want to turn to regardless of what it is.

Yesterday was probably harder for me than my 30th. Maybe b/c I had a newborn then. I'm now the age my Mom was when she had me! I got to have lunch with my friend/coworker (who regardless of the situation tells me what I need to hear and I love that) Julie Moore and then I had dinner with my husband, Aubrey and my Mom last night at home with a carrot cake Patrick made. Can I just say it was a great day/night? I got wished by over 170 FB friends Happy Birthday (must be popular huh lol).

Last night as I held my child and rocked her to sleep, I've never felt more content and more happy. I'm right where I'm supposed to be. I searched for so many years as an adult for where I was supposed to be and this is it. One more thing, last night my mom brought me a dozen white roses...the card read "for the daughter that already has everything". I chuckled and said "not hardly". But really as I thought about it...don't I have it all? I have everything I need....plus some.

--

Emma's First Trip Away

This week Emma is in Atlanta on a mission trip, she's there with her youth group from Forest Hills United Methodist. She is going to be gone 7 full days with no parents. Patrick is having a cow, I'm sure Susan is going crazy too and Megan well she misses playing with Emma the most. I miss her like always but miss her more b/c she's so far away and I know that the people that love her the most aren't there. I know that her youth pastors are great so I'm working on that :) Patrick warned her that she was to never ever be without her phone period. He's in for it in the next few years.


They are doing mission work and some fun things too like Coca Cola tour and I think Six Flags. Here are some pics we got yesterday from the church newsletter. She looks so grown up!

We are so proud of you Emma! You have a great heart of service!

Aubrey's 1 year Birthday

Wow what a ride this past year has been!!! Happy Birthday Baby Girl! You are a perfect and amazing gift from God and I cannot imagine our lives without you. We had your 1 year birthday party at The Journey Church on May 14 it was a great turnout and so many people that love you came out to celebrate. You are truly a sweet child with a great demeanor!









He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children. Praise the LORD!
(Psalms 113:9 Holy Bible ESV)

Right now in your life, you are trying to walk, babbling like crazy and showing more fun attitude than I could've imagined. You are sleeping all the way through the night. Feeding yourself and doing anything you want to independently. You are bottle free and paci free thanks to a fun time with some poison ivy that I passed along to you from working in the yard with your Dad! So we'll blame him!!! :)

Its gotten really hot here early so we bought you a pool for Easter - a little blow up one. You love the bathtub so it was a given that you'd love the pool and you do.




You love playing in the cabinets, you love giving kisses. You make everything a telephone and love all remotes.




You have started dancing by swinging your right arm back and forth and by stomping your feet when you hear music.



We love you more than you can imagine and can't wait to see what a sweet child and adult you turn into.

Aubrey's 11 month birthday

Today is Aubrey's 11 month birthday - I'm absolutely blessed at the sweet diva she's become. I love watching her learn and figure things out and how she loves to give kisses and snuggles to mommy and daddy. She is in this scream stage where she screams when she's happy sad wants attention - basically for any reason. Its funny but at some point we are going to have to stop laughing at it....she pulls up on everything, loves opening doors (every type of door, cabinets, entertainment center, fridge etc). Two of her fave things to play with are the TV remote and our cell phones. Funny she knows when we try to fake her out with ones that don't work or play remotes. She's so smart. My fave thing she does right now is dance - she smacks her leg like shes keeping beat and then she waves her arm left to right while being fully extended its hilarious. She's got rhythm. That's my girl.

I've been busy planning her first birthday party...sending out invites, favors and lots of other fun stuff - can't wait to celebrate the 1st year of her life. We've been through so much with her in the last few months I'm so glad to be back to a new normal.

My prayer today and everyday

Dear Lord, bless us and lift us up. Forgive our sins and make us like You. Thank you for our daughter. Bless her and let us be the mommy and daddy that you want us to be. Help me to love her more and more all the time and help me to point her to You. Bless everyone who has a child in their life and let them be good to them. Help them to seek You and your will, so they can do what is required. In Jesus' name, Amen."


Happy 11 months baby girl.

Surgery and updates on surgery

I blogged on Aubrey's caring bridge site through the surgery - for updates check out there www.caringbridge.org/visit/aubreysevers

Surgery Update

So in case you didn't know - We got the cancellation call for surgery for Aubrey on Monday. We spent from 11am until 5pm at Vanderbilt Childrens for Pre-op...we were cleared for surgery.

We arrived at Vanderbilt on Tuesday, March 7 at 6 am - we were taken back almost immediately to holding...Erik Reed, our pastor joined us. We played with Aubrey, answered the same questions over and over and then prayed over her. They took her away - not on a bed but carried her. I liked that - funny they distracted us and her as they took her away so no one broke down. They took her back a little before 7:30 as Dr. Kelly likes to start on time. We were told that the surgery could take anywhere from 3 hours to 5 hours. Dr. Kelly came out at 10:30 roughly and told us that the surgery was successful and that Aubrey did great. It'd be about an hour and a half before we could see her - he came back around 12:15 or so and told us she hasn't woke up yet and it'd be another hour and a half. Finally at 2 I was standing at the podium until they told me something. They called back, put on hold for awhile said they'd call back. I knew something was wrong. The nurse from the PACU came out and told me that Aubrey had some breathing issues when waking up - her pulse ox was too low and they thought they might have to reintubate. (put her breathing tube back in) They finally got her calm and thats when she came to us. I about lost it. Patrick and I went back and was with her - within 15 minutes she was calm and breathing better...she just needed us. Then we were just on for the wait of the room in the PICU (pediatric intensive care). We were in PACU until 8 pm last night waiting on a bed. The nurses were OUTSTANDING!!!! What a blessing.

We got moved to the PICU at 8:30 last night - while they were hooking her up we were in the waiting room. The same waiting room where two Christmas's ago I was pregnant with Aubrey and serving food to the families that were here. Full circle moment. I had been somewhat okay all day - but I lost it right then.

We had a decent first night - Aubrey was sedated and wasn't swelling too bad at this point. She kept her eyes awake alot until about 2am this morning when the finally swole the completely shut. Our first night Patrick slept about 5 hours total and me about 3 hours - we took turns. Some Mommy super power took over. That and Coffee got us through. We had two great nurses until 7 am Sarah Beth and Erica. Sarah Beth was a christian and she talked with me alot of the night. We were on a 2 nurse to 1 patient ratio - She was def a blessing for me last night.

At 7am this morning Kerri came on - she's a mother of 6, grandmother of 2 (almost 3) and doesn't look a day over 35. She's been great and served me with several encouraging words today and hugs when needed. Aubrey has had an extremely rough day today. Shes whined or whimpered most of the day. She can't open her eyes b/c they are swollen. Her pain receptors are tough apparently and they've had to give her extra doses of medicine and bumped her from Morphine to Dalodid (sp?). She's still struggling but doing okay. Her breathing is fine and she's been off oxygen and catherders since 2 am.

We have 3 things she needs to do before we get out of ICU- 1. Drain has to come out 2. open her eyes 3. Eat. Once she does this we are out to a normal room. Today she's swollen but not bruised. She still has the "no-no's" on her arms and one leg that keep her from pulling out her IV's. She still hasn't ate from a bottle all IV's - They came today and took her bandages off (she was not happy) and exposed her beautiful bald head and her incision -(I of course broke down) they said it looked great and with a little luck her drain could be taken out tomorrow. That means we can hold her. The part I miss the most. Nothing like your baby cryin and whimpering and all you can do is sing, talk and hold their hand. Her little head looks amazing swollen and all. The nurses all comment on how pretty she is. I just can't wait to see her smile again.

We've gotten some visitors mostly close friends and family - honestly we aren't going to let anyone but back right now to see her unless they are close friends family or church elders/pastors. We do however welcome visitors but we'll just spend some time with you guys and let Aubrey rest. The doctors said thats better on her recovery.

Anyhow - this is the update as of 6pm on Wednesday - I know this is rambled and thrown together but I'm going on 6 hours (TOPS) of sleep since Monday morning. We sincerely appreciate all of your love and support and prayers through this difficult time.

I'd ask that you comment on this blog so that I can print this and keep it for Aubrey one day to read.

Hugs....The Severs

Aubrey Surgery Update

We met with Dr. Kelly at Vanderbilt Children's on Wednesday, March 2. First of all, good lord the traffic there is crazy - leave early just b/c of the traffic situation. Finally found the office and got in there - they are the quickest office EVER. Appointment at 11 doctor in the office seeing us by 11:20 (he apologized for being late)...I was like ummmm can you talk to my other doctors!? He was very informative, friendly and put us at ease for what he was doing.

He's been a surgeon for 30 years and he does this specific surgery 3 to 4 times a week. 98% of his patients with Aubrey's condition only need 1 surgery. We will visit him every 3 to 4 months until she is 2 years old and then yearly until about 7 or so. Just to check on her head and catch it early if something is growing incorrectly. Her surgery is scheduled for April 19th, preop on the 18th. They will shave her head. Its a 5 hour surgery and it will be him and Dr. Tulipan (a neurosurgeon) and a full pediatric anesthesia team. GREAT TEAM!!! She will be getting a blood transfusion (scares me to death but I know that they screen it well), she will be in the hospital for a total of 7 days - 4 of them in the Pediatric ICU. Needless to say we'll be living at the hospital. He said he will fix her skull up where she can take bumps and falls that normal 10 month olds take. Obviously she can't fall off a roof or anything. The first week home we have to watch her close. She will be fragile for about 8 to 12 weeks after. Thank God she doesn't go to a normal daycare - kids after having this can't go back to daycare for 8 to 12 weeks. She's at an in home sitter where she's the only baby so we'll probably keep her home about 6 weeks (including hospital time). After the 12 weeks - she'll be just like any other kiddo. :)

**Side note - we are on the cancellation list so if another child gets sick we can have their spot or if there's a cancellation we get their spot - that being said this could all change if we get "the call"**

We are hoping this will be all that Aubrey has to endure and like I've said before I'm sure she'll recover quicker than we will. Her scar will be covered as soon as her hair begins growing back. Until then we'll be sporting our same hair bows but on headbands and crocheted hats instead of clipped to hair. We are taking her tomorrow to get her first hair cut. No way that I'm letting her surgery be her first haircut. Its cute b/c her hair is starting to curl up - I can't wait to see how it grows back. Its going to be thicker but I can't wait to see if it grows back curly or straight.

On the flip side - Aubrey's 1st birthday party is still scheduled for May 14th and we're going to party extra praising God about how healthy she is.

We have a ton of support, friends and family and prayers surrounding us. We are so blessed b/c of that and you really realize what you've got during times like these.

We are leaning on God to take care of our baby girl and leaning on our faith to know that regardless of what happens he will be there walking with us. Please forgive me - I know my thoughts are sporatic.

Aubrey Updates

So if you've been following my blogs you know we've had a CT Scan on Thursday for Aubrey to check to see if her sagittal suture was closed on her skull. The nurses on Thursday at Vanderbilt Children's were absolutely amazing. They told me it could be 48 hours but we got the CT Scan at 11 on Thursday, Dr. Joseph called me Friday by 12:30 with results. I was working and Patrick was at work...I asked her if I could call her right back with Patrick on the phone, I had a feeling I couldn't hear the results alone. We called right back and Dr. Joseph let us know that Aubrey's Anterior Suture and Sagittal Suture are indeed closed. Good news is her brain looks great and her facial features look great. The only issues are these two things. I asked her several questions but she was the first to admit she's not a specialist on this and to save my questions for Dr. Kelly (the Pediatric Plastic Surgeon). She said she's had a couple of patients with this diagnosis and they all did really well.

We meet with Dr. Kelly for our surgery consult on Wednesday at 11. We will learn then what exactly the surgery will entail and be able to ask questions and will be able to solidify a surgery date. From everything I've read and heard regardless of which suture it is they cut the same way - ear to ear like a headband. I've been put in touch with Mothers who's children has had this surgery (GODSEND) and been able to see pictures a few months after and you can hardly tell. So now we prepare for surgery.

Saturday we got Aubrey's 9 month pictures done (needed to do them anyways) but wanted some professional pics before they shave her head. YES THEY WILL SHAVE ALL HER PRETTY HAIR OFF. Bright side is that it'll grow back thicker and to be honest she'll probably still have more hair in 2 months than most girls her age. Next weekend we are planning to take her and have her first haircut. No way am I letting her first haircut be by a surgeon shaving her head. We'll just cut a bit off and the rest will come off at the surgery. We have a ton of hairbows and will be utilizing headbands until her hair grows back. If we get a helmet we'll get bigger bows for it.






Our family has felt an amazing outpouring of love from everyone that we know. We have deep faith that God has put us in the struggle for a reason. Not sure what it is but I really do believe it. Maybe so that our struggles can be a witness for someone else, so that we can be drawn closer to God...something. If I didn't believe this mornings sermon at the Journey Church solidified that for me. I literally cried the entire time.

We are absolutely in love with our child but we know that ultimately she is God's and he will use her for his will.

For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
—2 Corinthians 12:10

Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name.
—1 Peter 4:12-14, 16

Stay tuned for more updates. We'll probably update again on Wednesday with surgery date. Thanks again for all the thoughts and prayers.

Aubrey CT Scan

So today we had the CT Scan at Vanderbilt Childrens Hospital to check Aubrey's sutures in her skull. For those of you that are wondering...sutures are "soft" spots in your skull that allows your skull to grow as your brain grows - if one grows up too early your brain still has to grow therefore you're brain grows where it can - possibly creating an abnormally shaped head at best or even intercranial pressure from the brain pressing on the skull and in turn mentally handicapping a child. Its not good.

My daughter is so stubborn like me that it took a double dose of sedation to get her to go to sleep - went in at 11 got the first dose at 11:35 at 1:30 she finally went under (btw going under is normally a 20 minute process) - 4 minutes for the CT and an hour for her to come out. Stubborn thing! :) She woke up fine ate and then we headed home. She's acted extremely groggy and drunk most of the day/afternoon when she's awake anyways. I took a little video of her drunkness it was funny and to be honest our family needed a laugh today.

On to the waiting game now. We are hoping for results tomorrow but they say 48 hours so in reality it could be Monday. We still haven't told Megan and Emma anything except she had a doctors appt and a test, just seems best not to worry them.

Today though at the hospital I was so humbled by our situation. You know if Aubrey has to have this surgery, is fixable..shes healthy otherwise. I was overwhelmed with emotion when I saw all the kids. You know you go to a hospital normally you see all types of ages...but not here just kids....it tore me apart. I remember the Christmas I was pregnant with Aubrey our Church went and served food to families on Christmas night at Vanderbilt Childrens. At that point I was still praying for a boy. I left that night saying I don't care if its a boy or a girl just healthy and that we never have to come back here. Today I faced my biggest fear. The staff is great and knowledgable and loving but I really hope I never have to see them again.

Tonight we're still clinging to hope that it will be clear. Still preparing for the worst and praying for the best. We are still asking for prayers....for everyone, Doctors, Radiologists, us and most of all Miss Aubrey. Thanks to everyone that has reached out to us and even those that haven't that have been thinking and praying for us.

Aubrey 9 month checkup

Today we went for Aubrey's 9 month checkup - I went alone (first time to go alone) and got there -Everything seemed fine.... we measured at 27"long(50th percentile) and at 17lbs and 10 ozs (25th percentile) her head of course is still off the charts. Dr. Joseph let us know she wanted us to go for a X-Ray to check to see if Aubreys sutures on her skull were closing b/c her head is so big. Just precautionary she said. We went for a x-ray at 1:30 by 3:30 we got the dreaded phone call. Aubrey's sagittal suture runs from the top of your head to the base of your skull appears to be closed or closing on the xray. What comes next? Well Thursday at 11am we have a sedation 3d CT scan at Vanderbilt Childrens Hospital. It should take 48 hours to get results. Because of when our appointment is I'm fully expecting it to be Monday before we get the definite answer. It could be open and normal but I'm not counting on that just b/c I personally am a "prepare for the worst and pray for the best" person. Even me with an untrained eye could see there wasn't a defined suture on the x-ray. We are hoping that the CT scan proves that she's perfectly healthy and the suture is just fine....but if not on we go to the Pediatric Plastic Surgeon at Vanderbilt to discuss our options on March 2. The good news is that children between 6 months and 12 months are the best candidates for the corrective surgery b/c their skull is still soft and heals faster and cleaner.

I'm sending a plea to all of you to pray for Aubrey and pray for the Doctors that they will have the knowledge to either give her a clean bill of health or the knowledge to fix her. I know that Gods got this but man I still feel like I've been kicked in the stomach.

Thanks to everyone for your thoughts and prayers.
Misty & Patrick

Day 2 - 17 Day Diet

Today our menu consists of:
8 - 8 ounce water

Bfast:
Misty -3 Scrambled Eggs I added 3/4 cup of cooked lean ground turkey and bell peppers with a pinch of low fat cheddar cheese
1 apple
Patrick - 3 scrambled Eggs - 1 navel orange
Both - 1 cup of green tea

Misty - 1 8 oz cup of coffee - 1/2 cup of acidophlous milk, 1 truvia, splash of agave nectar ( 1 negative water drank extra 8 oz glass of water)

Lunch:
Patrick - spinach leaf salad with tomotoes, cucumbers, peppers and balsamic dressing, plain yogurt mixed with berries
Misty - was still extremely full from breakfast 15 carrot sticks and 1 apple
Both - 1 cup of green tea

Dinner:
Turkey Meatloaf (made with lean ground turkey, worschertshire, garlic powder, pepper, bell peppers and onions
Steamed Brussel Sprouts
1 cup of green tea

Snacks/Dessert 2nd probiotic - Misty & Patrick - Chocolate Mousse - 1 3/4 cup (both of our servings) plain yogurt, 2 tbsp of unsweetened cocoa, 2 packs of truvia - I couldn't eat all of mine b/c it was so sweet so I supplemented the rest of probiotic with a 1/2 cup of acidopholous milk.


I had a really good day today - really full most of the day couldn't eat all of my food :) Maybe the coffee helped not sure. I did have a massive headache (sugar low) but it cured itself by lunchtime.

I did my 17 minute cardio abs today also


Just so everyone knows I'm 2 days in and 4 lbs down! :)

WHOOP WHOOP!!!

Day 1: 17 Day Diet

Today our menu consists of:

Bfast:
2 Scrambled Eggs (I added bell peppers and onions to mine and a bit of pepper)
1 navel orange
1 cup of green tea

Lunch:
1/2 cup cottage cheese
Patrick - Salad (romaine lettuce, grape tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, broccoli, bell peppers) 2 tbsp of balsamic vinegar
Misty - Salad (romaine lettuce, grape tomatoes, carrots, cucumbers, celery) - 1- 5oz can of tuna and 2tbsp of balsamic vinegar
1 cup of green tea

Dinner:
Grilled Chicken (2 breasts each) baked with a dash of worscheshire, hot sauce and a few sprinkles of spicy Mrs. Dash
Asparagus (steamed)
Broccoli, Cauliflower and Carrots (steamed)
1 cup of green tea

Snacks:
3/4 cup of plain yogurt
1 cup of mixed berries (blackberries, raspberries and blueberries) - I discovered I don't like blackberries or raspberries today :)
(I added one pack of truvia to this) YUMMY minus above berries :)

I will say it wasn't that bad (minus my HUGE sugar cravings which is my own fault for knowing I was going on this and eating every sweet in sight yesterday). I found out today from a couple of forums that we can have 2 - 8 oz cups of coffee per day - so I'm going to try sweetening it with Agave Nectar and using acidopholous milk for cream. Both are on the diet. But Coffee is negative water so I'll have to drink 2 extra cups of water tomorrow. BUT WORTH IT - YAY COFFEE.

The only thing I can really tell you is try not to go anywhere without a snack b/c you (like us) are probably used to overeating so you'll be hungry constantly. Good news is you're hungry b/c your body is burning the food off so quickly. The only other thing is don't every get far from a bathroom man you'll pee all day! :)

Stay tuned for more in our journey!!

"I can do anything for 17 days!!!"

17 Day Diet

Patrick and I have decided as a family to start the 17 Day Diet. This was endorsed by Dr. Phil and the more we read about it the more we thought it might work. Neither of us have a ton of weight to lose but have been feeling the need to become more healthy. I was extremely discouraged a first b/c I'm not a "diet" girl, I love my sweets and overall (even with my flaws), I'm happy with my body. After we got the book and began reading it I felt motivated. The book runs in cycles (4 of them) each cycle in 17 days to allow the diet to shock your body and not plateau. The one thing I struggled with before ordering the book is that I had no idea what the food looked like - that's why I'm digging into it here. BTW the only place to buy this is at www.17daydiet.com

We started today on the 1st Cycle - its similar to the Atkins diet in the beginning. The book gives you a specific list of foods you can have and even offers recipes for the cycles. The only thing you really have to count is that you have to have 2 probiotics and 2 fruits per day (no fruit after 2pm) - you can have as much protein and cleansing veggies as you want. The book speaks to hunger meters also.

The daily food looks something like this:

8 - 8 ounces of Water (1 cup being room temperature 1st thing in the morning with a half of a lemon squeezed in to start your digestive juices)

Bfast:
Protein or Probiotic Serving
1 Fruit
1 cup of Green Tea

Lunch:
Protein or Probiotic Serving
Cleansing Veggies
1 cup of Green Tea

Dinner:
Protein
Cleansing Veggies

Snacks:
2nd Probiotic
2nd Fruit
I'm not a fan of Probiotics so I'm wondering if after this week if I'll take a supplement for this vs eating the food (Kefir, Acidophilus milk, plain or fruit sugar free yogurt, cottage cheese). Protein makes me feel more full so obviously I favor it.

The AWESOME things is you can have as much protein and cleansing veggies as you want....so you're always full, as long as you stick to the list.

The only other thing you have to do is exercise....obviously!! :) We got the DVD that came along with and it has 17 minute workouts on it - that's the minimum 1 - 17 minute workout a day....the more the better.

I can't wait to get this moving. Right now I'm crashing and I miss coffee but I'm still feeling encouraged. Look for the update/menu selection post later tonight....